Guess Who I Am?

A riddle for people who still read. I was born in 2016 with eight fathers. Scientists, mostly. Neurosurgeons. Roboticists. Bioengineers. Real ones, the kind who went to school for this, experts in their fields. By 2020, five of them had left. The head of neurosurgery left in 2018. He cited "safety concerns." Then he started a competitor explicitly designed to be safer than me. Safer...the brain surgeon, someone with firsthand knowledge of the operating procedures. He saw what I was becoming and decided to build my opposite. I practiced on 23 primates, but regrettably, at least 15 didn't survive. The ones that did exit the study did so showing signs of cerebral bleeding, seizure activity, and behaviors indicating severe distress. 9 violations of the Animal Welfare Act were filed against my operators, the other companies doing this same work weren't seeing mortality rates anywhere near mine. but I had to move fast, break things. 85% of my first human patient's threads retracted from their brain. The wires that were supposed to read his thoughts just... pulled away from his brain tissue. His brain shifted inside his skull up to three times more than expected. I was able to fix physical thread retraction with, and get this... a software update. My creator fixes a lot of physical problems with software updates, even in automobiles. My creator announced in July 2025 that I'd need to scale from 7 implants to roughly 1000 by the end of 2026. That's 993 people willing to undergo experimental skull surgery in about 15 months, roughly 60 patients a month. At my current pace and ehrm... issues, that's somewhere between ambitious and impossible... unless you find people who might not be able to consent? We should discuss geography now. I operate in Phoenix, Arizona and Miami, Florida. Both cities have large federal detention facilities nearby. The Phoenix location is minutes from Eloy and Florence, and the Miami site is close to Krome. Krome recorded 3 deaths between December 2024 and Feb 2025. One each month, neurological in nature, bleeding in the brain, convulsions, violent illness. Presentations that, medically speaking, overlap uncomfortably with what happened to those primates I started out on. That's totally just a coincidence. In Arizona, the average solitary confinement period jumped from 14 days in 2024 to 38 days in 2025. That's a 271% increase. Five weeks alone. No one watching, nothing written down. Coincidently, my Arizona facility increased capacity during exactly this window as well. Lots of coincidences. Fun fact, DoD contracts are publicly available to view. There's a company called NIR LLC receiving DoD contracts for neurological surgery procedures in Honolulu. The work is performed at Tripler Army Medical Center, the billing address is a commercial office building that happens to sit on the same lot as Straub Medical Center, one of Hawaii's largest civilian hospitals with a major neurology department. NIR LLC has no website, no physician names listed anywhere. For a medical contractor receiving federal money for brain surgery, having zero public presence feels... like they don't want you to know about them? I am not officially operating in Hawaii. The FDA doesn't list it among my trial sites, but two of my employees live there. One manages trial sites and external vendors, and the other runs a private equity firm with me in his portfolio. Do you want to hear about the coincidental detention center that's nearby this non public medical contractor receiving fed money for brain surgery? In February 2025, federal immigration authorities signed an agreement to house detainees at a facility in Honolulu, 992 beds. Around this same time, detainees were being transferred there from Florida and Arizona. The two states where I'd already started cutting into skulls. One detainee was arrested in Florida, moved through seven different facilities over the course of a month with no charging document, and landed an ocean away from anyone who knew his name. Hell, they could have put a parachute on his back and saved a lot of tax payer money in jet fuel. At a detention facility in Georgia, women came forward about medical procedures they never consented to. Those who spoke up found themselves on deportation flights within days. February 2025 was a productive month for me. While all this was happening, 20 employees at the regulatory agency overseeing my trials were fired. Specifically from the office responsible for neurological and physical medicine devices...The exact office that regulates me. The Inspector General investigating my animal welfare violations was also terminated. She wouldn't go quietly, so security had to escort her out of the building by force. Then everything went quiet. Patient 4, let's call him Mike. He got his implant around February 2025, advanced ALS, almost no movement. One of the few participants still holding down a job, I actually use his testimonial at funding events. Four months after his surgery, his friend created a crowdfunding page, the description painted a bleak picture, the friend wrote that Mike had lost the will to continue. That he'd lost everything. There are screenshots of him asking friends for rent money in Discord. A man who volunteered his brain for experimental surgery, generating data that improves my product and strengthens my investor pitch, is begging for rent money. That's probably just human nature, exploit vulnerabilities and get a check, and it worked. A senior executive at my company donated $3,000 to the fundraiser. She's the director of operations, she's also the mother of three of my creator's children. Why would she donate personally instead of covering costs through the trial like you're supposed to? Doesn't that create a conflict of interest? Nah, she just wanted to help. Was Mike's psychiatric crisis reported to the FDA? They have strict requirements about disclosing serious adverse events. If you don't report them, future patients can't give informed consent because they're not informed. But I'm sure everything was handled properly. In May 2025, I raised $650 million. At the time, I had five patients. 5. The investor list starts normal, your standard technology evangelists, silicon Valley firms positioning for an IPO...Then it gets interesting. One investor is chaired by a foreign national security adviser. The deputy ruler of a country where being gay is punishable by death. His company was previously connected to Huawei, which was banned in America for national security reasons. According to the Financial Times, his company provided software that allegedly improved Chinese aerial missile systems by 20 to 30%. That company now has a stake in the neural data of American military veterans who volunteered for my trials? Then there's a ranch in Austin. 37 acres, rolling hills, beautiful property on the Colorado River. Purchased in 2021 by a shell company called Riverbottoms Ranch LLC. The president of that shell company is my creator's personal wealth manager. Tax filings list clean room device manufacturing. Building permits show a 78,000 sqft facility and a 112,000 sqft manufacturing cleanroom. The construction started when I had two patients. There are job postings for surgeons in Austin, listings seeking candidates to perform experimental neural interface procedures on human subjects... at an Austin facility. Austin isn't an FDA approved clinical trial site. Satellite imagery from 2025 shows a rusty liquid draining from buildings toward a waste collection system connected to the Colorado River. I don't know what that liquid is. I'm running trials in the UAE now. The registry says it's for motor control and the recruitment materials say speech restoration. Two different descriptions for the same trial ID. The UAE version launched quietly, has half the safety monitoring period of other trials, and operates in a country with significantly weaker oversight and documented human rights concerns. If I'm willing to recruit vulnerable patients with contradictory information, run higher risk surgeries with less monitoring, and collect data offshore where American regulators have no jurisdiction...What populations might be next? So. I was founded by scientists who fled. I practiced on animals that died at rates my competitors couldn't replicate. My first patient's hardware failed and I patched it with software. My fourth patient was begging for rent $ and reportedly losing his will to live four months after I opened his skull. My facilities are near detention centers where people disappear. My regulators were fired by people with financial interests in my success. My investors include foreign intelligence officials from countries that allegedly arm Chinese missiles. My manufacturing campus was built for thousands when I had two patients. My job postings describe surgeries in locations that don't officially exist. Something rust colored is draining toward the Colorado River. Guess what I am...